I am a mother. And on Mother’s Day, I am excited to be wished and given gifts. Offered discounts, and made to feel special through messages, forwards, emojis, GIFs, and so on. Of course, I am thankful that a special day is allotted for the world to recognize my contribution in doing my bit in the larger scheme of things. I mean it was said that it takes a village to raise a child. But for some reason, villages are fast disappearing or converting themselves into modernized urban centers. And for totally unrelated reasons, new age children seem to be not ours, but offspring of superhuman species who are capable of doing absolutely anything, anytime, anywhere.
Evolution of mothers
Anyway, irrespective of the kind of evolvement of kids today, mothers mostly haven’t evolved to the same extent. Though thankfully we no longer belong to the Nirupa Roy era. (You know teary-eyed 24/7, with an expression of love that I cannot seem to muster even on my best mothering days).
Mothers today are mostly modern, hands-on, and ready for combat, either verbal or physical depending on the age of the child. Yet, at the end of the day, we are mothers. Soft, emotional, mushy, protective, and easily offended. And so as mothers, can we at least in this letter, let you all know what we really would want on Mother’s Day? Don’t get me wrong, mothers are filled with gratitude for a single day’s acknowledgment of their existence. But may we ask for more?
The Mother’s Day list
To make it all quick and easy to understand, I thought a bullet point presentation would work. Oh yes, we have learned the finer aspects of technology and effective planning. More while doing our kid’s projects than at the office and surprisingly much to the absolute ignorance of their teachers!
So here is a mother’s wish list of how we would ideally want to be wished on not only Mother’s Day, but well on other days too. (Sorry, not wasting any opportunity is a mother’s most lethal weapon.)
To kids and family: On daily chores
- Please make breakfast every day. Oh no, I don’t mean the surprise breakfast on Mother’s Day alone. I mean please make your own breakfast each day. And without having mothers run behind you or cajoling you to take a bite. How hard is it to toast bread and spread butter on it? Or fill a glass of milk that is kept ready and boiled on the stove already? Or break an egg in the pan and scramble it yourself?
- Before you make breakfast, make sure to wake up! Just like how on Mother’s Day, children and husbands seem to rush into the bedroom with open arms, as moms lay cozily wrapped under white bed covers! No, no, that is not how it really unfolds, but well the thought counts. Never mind the running in with open arms. But it would do a whole lot of good if children could wake up on their own. You know those smartphones also have an alarm clock, just as they do the zillions of useless game and video downloads. Just saying!
To kids and family: Miscellaneous
- I am sure mothers truly enjoy reading those adorable Mother Day cards. But watching the creativity and handwriting of our kids, often makes us wish for them to use these skills while perhaps doing homework or helping us write our shopping list. You know why not thank and make your mom happy by making her see neat well written essays, preferably without red circular marks. Or just use your artistic geniuses to decorate envelopes or wrap gifts when you are attending a birthday party or wedding, without her first yelling and then almost begging after you.
- There are some lucky moms, who get actual gifts on Mother’s Day. No, I don’t mean making the bed or not throwing tantrums for a day type of gifts. I mean real gift-wrapped things that are gifted by children and family. Well, thank you, family and friends, for those lovely gifts. But please do gift moms things that they want or desire for their own sake. Buying them coffee mugs, cushion covers or home items can be stalled for housewarming or maybe Diwali. Buy for mothers things that they crave without ever asking them out loud. Fathers and family please buy them heels and carry the baby yourself. Gift them a coupon for a spa or a movie ticket outing with friends. Buy them some time to finish their lunch, wash their hair or do makeup in peace.
- On Mother’s Day and forever, wish by being genuine. Acknowledge us by not judging but encouraging and appreciating. We can be working and yet taking good care of our kids. We can be at home and yet be useless. Either way or any other way, it is really nobody’s business. Children are individual entities by themselves. Not a reflection of a mother’s upbringing alone. A fat child is not overstuffed and a thin child is not malnourished by the mother. A rude child does not live with a rude mother and a polite kid is not ruled by a strict mom. Acknowledge mothers by knowing and believing that each of us gives our best. And in the end, that is all that really matters.
- Wish us on Mother’s Day, by making sure that no child is lesser than another. That there is joy in learning and playing. There is equal opportunity for every child to unleash, prosper and find the truest potential in themselves. As maternal human beings, not necessarily only as mothers, stand up for each kid and stand up for the future. Make yours and help make our lives inclusive, empathic, and courageous. Because children learn best through watching adults and those around them.
- Lastly, as mothers, please treat us as people first. We are persons with dreams, opinions, ambitions, likes, and dislikes. We are mothers only later. See us as we are and help us see ourselves too, more than just as mothers.
On that note, a very Happy Mother’s Day to all! Do check out our video made especially for all mothers.
Also, a few gift ideas for mother’s on their special day: